You Said It, Not Me

“When we understand that slide, we’ll have won the war,” General McChrystal:


“PowerPoint makes us stupid.” Gen. James N. Mattis of the Marine Corps, the Joint Forces commander

You Said It, Not Me

"Every time she lifts her leg, I think another kid is going to fly out."
–Joan Rivers (on The View)

You Said It, Not Me

"Who the hell is Oliver Wendell Holmes to tell me what's constitutional? Also, who the hell is Oliver Wendell Holmes?"
-Stephen Colbert

You Said It, Not Me

"To tell you the truth, man, [being a] lawyer isn't something I wanted to do. Nobody wants to be a lawyer -- it's hard work. But it was kind of my academic route."
(Noting that if he were to practice, he'd go into "business or corporate law.")
-Vinny Guadagnino (aka. "Vinny" of The Jersey Shore)

You Said It, Not Me

"Did you know that candles are made by losers?"
- Bart Simpson

You Said It, Not Me

"I'm clearly not ugly."
– Megan Fox (to Entertainment Weekly)

You Said It, Not Me

"Tiger Woods is the Tiger Woods of cheating on his wife."

You Said It, Not Me

I like the word "indolence."
It makes my laziness sound classy.

-Bern Williams

You Said It, Not Me

"Irina's actually a really good designer . . . the only problem with her is that she's a bitch."
- Nicolas Putvinski

You Said It, Not Me

"The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs."

-Charles de Gaulle

You Said It, Not Me

"From a technical perspective, the recession is very likely over at this point."
- Ben Bernanke

You Said It, Not Me

"The second that I decided I wanted to be in front of the camera I kind of, I think I’ve always kind of, you know … I aspired to be like Britney Spears in the tabloids."

How eloquently put.

You Said It, Not Me

"I definitely have some kind of mental problem and I haven’t pinpointed what it is."
- Megan Fox

You Said It, Not Me

K-Fed's permanent fail.